Multiple Mama

This week is twins, triplets and more week, a week that would usually have passed me by. I may have seen an odd mention on social media sites, cooed over some multiple baby pictures and that would be it. I wouldn’t have given it anymore thought and I definitely wouldn’t have considered the parents of twins. This year twins are pretty much ALL I can think about, in the best possible way. Our twin boys have been with us for over half a year now, I have been a Multiple Mama for six whole months. I spot twins now everywhere we go, I read twin blogs, I buy everything in twos. For us it is now normal to have two babies, so normal that sometimes me and my husband feel the need to say out loud, ‘we have two babies’ in absolute awe as if to remind ourselves how extraordinary it is to be the parent of multiples.

I know everyone says that the time flies with you second child(ren) but it really does, it seems like I’m missing six months. I remember holding the twins in my arms for the very first time as they were both placed on my chest, Brandon had his eyes open and stared at me the whole time as I spoke to them. Arthur was quiet and content, just happy to be cuddled. I didn’t know which one to look at and felt like I had to divide my time equally (something that has never gone away). I remember the first night on my own on the ward with them; I was confined to my bed and a lovely midwife would help me whenever I needed her. I remember the second night when I stubbornly did everything myself as I knew I would have to muddle through at home. We brought them home on the third day, so tiny in their car seats and we were stopped so many times before we made it to the car. Since then I remember moments, fleeting little memories; the way they could both sleep on Daddy’s chest, how they slept so snugly side by side, first smiles, sleepless nights, anxious bath times, endless laundry, our first walk as a new family of five.

Now we are here, six months on and I’m only just beginning to realise that it doesn’t get any easier. Each stage brings new challenges to replace the ones you left behind, I suppose that is true for every parent but it is magnified with twins. One of the hardest things for me and it is something that isn’t getting any easier, is that I simply cannot give all of my children the attention I would love to, not all of the time. Maybe that is more difficult with a three year old too but I feel I’ve missed out on the little extras that a new baby brings. Those little baby snuggles when they can just nod off on you and you can sit like that for hours, the lazy mornings were you can lounge in bed and stay in your pyjamas. Little things aren’t easy with two, like finding five minutes in your day for tummy time or reading a bedtime story or trying to treat them as individuals as they are becoming older (they are always called ‘the babies’ in our house). When they sleep I try to get a few jobs done, eat, have a hot cup of tea and play with Lucas then I am back to sharing myself with three little ones.

Then I’ll see something that makes my heart melt; Lucas passing them a toy, saying ‘My brothers, my babies,’ a glance and a smile between Arthur and Brandon when they reach out to hold hands, crazy giggles when they see Lucas dancing, all little things that remind me how truly special it is to have children and especially precious to to have twins. Before we had them I could never have imagined what it would be like and now I couldn’t imagine my family any other way, three perfect boys who drive me crazy but totally stole my heart.