Terrible Twos {The Ordinary Moments}

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I feel like I haven’t really had a handle on this last week; things seemed to be slipping out of my control and it feels like I’m always playing catch up. I think that on the whole having the twins has been easier than I expected but every now and then things catch up with me and I feel like I can’t give enough to each child. It always seems to be Lucas who bears the brunt of it because he is the most independent.

The last few weeks we’ve had moments of the terrible twos; complete meltdowns happen before our eyes over the most unbelievable things. Socks and pyjamas seem to have been problems this week; utter horror at any socks I offer him and the cries when I just pick a pair from him to wear. Every set of pyjamas I get out are met with the same hysterics and I could go on. I feel like I’m looking for my happy little boy and wishing that this phase would just end but then there is the awful guilt that part of it is my fault; he has been truly amazing with the twins arrival but I think the novelty is wearing off. He is still brilliant with the babies but it seems like I only ever say, ‘no’ or ‘wait a moment’ or ‘I’ll just do this then I’ll play’ and it has left him well and truly fed up and determined to cause havoc. Would this phase have happened anyway…probably? It just seems harder to deal with when I don’t get to spend that quality time with him.

He gets out and about a lot with family and I know he is well behaved for them. I felt like this week has been almost a cry for help! He wants to spend some time with me out and about, not stuck in the house while I busy around him occasionally grabbing five minutes to play. I knew that we needed to put some time aside for him and get out the house. Even so we didn’t do anything wildly exciting but it has seemed to do the trick for all of us. He had his first hairdressers haircut booked for Saturday morning. Of course I was dreading it so we’d had a chat about being good at the hairdressers and I shamelessly offered the lure of a treat if he was good.

As always he surprises me when I least expect it; he woke up the happiest he’s been in a few days and was brilliant in the hairdressers. My mum came round to watch the twins and we took him out to get his treat (a train and a mad run round the toy shop) and stopped for lunch with just the three of us. He behaved perfectly and I couldn’t have been more proud of him; we spent lunch playing with his new train, chatting about all sorts and sharing a ice cream. We snapped a few (terrible quality) iPhone photos but they’ve captured the day and that’s all that counts. Before bed I told him what a lovely day I had had and asked if he had had a nice day. ‘Yeah’ was all he said before the best bedtime, story time and lovely cuddles we’ve had in weeks. A day like this reminds me why I keep going through the tough weeks, my love for him is endless.

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14 Comments

  1. Oh it must be so hard for you. I remember it being tricky when I had just the one baby to distract me from Charles.
    It sounds like he is reacting like a normal 2 year old though, Harry is going through this with socks, trousers, tops and so on.
    It sounds like you had a lovely time together. I swear by date days now, just a little cinema trip or shopping trip with Charles to reconnect.
    You are doing a fantastic job xx

    • Thank you so much Lauren, sometimes it just helps to hear other people go through the same things you do. It’s so easy to think you’re getting it wrong. Your little dates with Charles look so much fun, it feels like a real treat to get that time with them xx

  2. I can completely relate. LP is 2 and a half and very much in a ‘no’ stage and doing exactly as she pleased, ignoring any instructions and just complaining about absolutely anything from the wrong colour top to the wrong type of cup to the wrong flavour milkshake! Nothing is ever good enough at the moment and some days are one hell of a struggle.
    But I only have one baby to deal with at the same time whereas you have twins. Hats off to you. No idea how I’d deal with twins as well as a terrible two! I guess you just get on with it because you have to! x

    • Thank goodness it’s not just me, what is it about clothes that seems to set them off?! I have tried to be so much more ‘go with the flow’ this time round but like you say some days just seem like a struggle. Then they surprise you and behave so well when you least expect it so kind of makes the struggle worth it! xx

  3. I am sorry that it’s been a tough week lovely, and we all have them, it’s not just you. It must be so hard with not just one, but two babies and a toddler to look after and I think you need to give yourself amazing credit for that. I think it is just the terrible twos, they all go through them. We are currently being a cheeky three year old, it carries on unfortunately. 😉 But just when we have a day off full on grumps and strops, the next few days she will be an angel. We just never know! x

    • Thank you Katie, it’s so easy to convince yourself that you’re doing everything wrong when all you get is strops. Does it sound weird to say its so nice to hear other children do it too? I hope not, just feels easier to handle when you know it’s not just your child! He is fiercely independent but I think still wants the security of having me uninterrupted. I’m loving doing these ordinary moments by the way, seems to always get something off my chest 🙂 xx

  4. Wow you really do have your hands full my dear. I think it’s just a normal 2 year old thing. Buba is like this and all the attention goes on his baby sister and he acts out. I always think am I doing a good job here? Or am I neglecting one without the other. So hard to divide myself into two. It’s not just you! Sorry you are having a bad week though, know that you are doing an amazing job super mom and next week is another week to catch up. lol

    • Thank you, I can’t tell you what a difference it makes to hear it’s not just me! To be fair this has been the worst week so far, on the whole things have been good. Some weeks it just seems like all the little things add up and it does feel like you need to divide yourself. Already this week feels better, stepping up the positive attitude this week 🙂

  5. Sorry to hear you’ve had a tough week. I can’t imagine how many directions you’re pulled in on a daily basis, but you’re doing great. Terrible twos are crazy, and so are baby days, but you’ll get there, one deep breath and baby step at a time. Glad you had one good day together this week though.

    • Thank you, I already feel better this week. I think it’s helped admitting that this last week really wasn’t good! Now I can move on and keep going and yes, lots of deep breathes 🙂

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