Honestly, I try not to think of Lucas starting school too often, my stomach flips everytime I think of it. This week we had a meeting at his school to learn more about what will happen in September and the headteacher welcomed us by saying, ‘we hope this will be the start of a fantastic seven year relationship’, seven years! It really hits home that this is happening now and it’s a big thing. All those parents sit together in the hall and each one wants to give their child the very best, they want them to shine in school, to be looked after and understood.
We already know the school as he goes to the pre-school there but it was nice to see his new classrooms and meet the teachers. I know everyone looks for different things in a primary school but this one seems just right for us; it is so welcoming and has the good feeling when you walk round it. We wanted somewhere that allows them to be children, to let them be young and allows for learning at a child’s pace. In the talk there was no mention of levels and targets and lots of talk about everything they do outside of the classroom, like toasting marshmallows and nature drawings, afterall they are only four! The classrooms were full of bright art work, gruffalo pictures, books in every corner; as we walked round we smiled and pointed out the things that we know Lucas would love and we could see other parents doing the same.
I am so pleased that this will be his school, whenever we go to see it me and my husband come away talking about how much we love the feel of it. We can see Lucas being happy there and even think of the twins starting there in a few years. The children seem happy and the parents are behind the school, it is a community that we will be part of for a long time and we already feel a part of.
In September his teacher will welcome in another class of 30 children and to them it will be the start of another working year but to me it is the start of something new and strange, my son will be among those children. We met all the teachers and I’m sure each parent feels the same – you want to talk to them and to tell them all about your child. To tell them all the amazing things they can do and let them know what they aren’t so good at. You have a desperate urge to explain your child even though I know that any good teacher will have them figured out in under a week.
I don’t really think I smother my children, Lucas is certainly very independent but for most of the day he will be without me and that is hard. We’ve spent the last four years together and I know him inside out; I want to tell them that he is stubborn, he’s strong-willed and that sometimes he can be hard work but I also want to tell them that he’s worth it, he is worth the hard work because he is kind, he is full of fun, he loves to play and make friends. He is still trying to figure it all out and although he will need a firm hand he will need a whole load of compasssion too.
Of course as parents we see the very best in our children, we see all that they can be and as they start school we are passing that over to someone else. This feeling is strange, I will miss him more than I can say and yet it is exciting for Lucas. It makes me think of my own mum when I started school and how I never, ever realised what it must have been like for her. Until now I have never thought about how she must have felt walking me into the classroom on my first day. We moved a few times when I was young and I joined my main primary school a few months late – all the worry that must have gone into that decision and I was oblivious to it all. I had my days when I was nervous, I was shy and quiet but I always went into school happily when she must have been a nervous wreck. I have never understood how difficult it must have been for her until now, I must ask her about it! In some ways it makes me feel better; for all my worry and sadness Lucas will never know it. I may leave school with tears but he will go into class full of excitement. On his first day at school it is all about him, it is the start of a new adventure, the start of something amazing.
16 Comments
What a gorgeous post Hun. As you say, such an exciting time for Lucas. I will be the same as you, heartbroken inside when the girls start school. I will miss them so much. It’s amazing how mums show us how brave they are to our face but now a mum yourself you know she was breaking inside. This school sounds amazing. I love schools that allow the parents to get involved. I think it’s important to express interest in the school your children go to and commit time to their education. Your boys are blessed to have you as their mummy. Xxxxx
June 11, 2015 at 8:46 pmThank you for your lovely comment Kat. You are so right about being part of the school, I think if you work with them rather than against them you can get the very best for your child. I signed up to join the Friends group of the school and they were all so lovely, not as bad as I thought it might be! I am looking forward to being a part of it all too xx
June 17, 2015 at 9:36 amIt’s such a scary but exciting time….It sounds like a lovely school I hope Lucas settles in well.
June 11, 2015 at 9:14 pmThank you, I know he will but will still be nervous come September!
June 17, 2015 at 9:36 amSuch a beautiful post Hayley and do you know what, he will love it. I will never forget Jack and Joe’s first days at school both days I just sat by the phone, I couldn’t focus on anything and they never missed me one little bit, they were ready which I am sure Lucas is too, you are such a wonderful Mum xxx
June 11, 2015 at 11:10 pmThank you so much Sarah, I know Lucas will be just the same as your boys, I will be all nervous and he won’t have a care in the world! xx
June 17, 2015 at 9:37 amAhhh I have similar feelings about having Lyla start preschool. I agree that children should look at a child pace as well and couldn’t send my daughter to a snooty school that’s trying to make them into cookie cutter baby geniuses. I’m glad you love the school you’ve chosen!
June 12, 2015 at 12:36 pmExactly that Tina!! I just want him to enjoy school and not feel pressured!
June 17, 2015 at 9:38 amDon’t….I am crying now! I cannot even imagine how I will feel when Harry & Lottie start. Both gone at the same time! Although what an exciting and amazing new chapter. Sports Day, plays, and all the fun to come. He’ll be great and so will you and it will be a lovely new time for you all xxxx
June 12, 2015 at 1:39 pmOh I know, it will seem so strange when they both go off to school, at least I’ll still have the twins at home! xx
June 17, 2015 at 9:38 amIt’s so nerve wracking isn’t it but it sounds like you have a really lovely school picked and hopefully Lucas will love it instantly. We have our first parents meeting with them on Monday and then a home visit. I’m already so nervous 🙂
June 12, 2015 at 10:46 pmI don’t know why I still get nervous about meeting teachers, haha! I can imagine that Z will just love going to school though, so much to learn!
June 17, 2015 at 9:39 amYou know school is really fun for them and it’s the start of seeing them grow so much. I know it is a scary thought when you think it is for the next seven years, but they will be seven good years! Sam was ready for school months before the September so I was more than happy for him to start! haha. Don’t worry, he will be fine and so will you xx
June 14, 2015 at 9:04 pmThanks Julia, I can tell from reading your blog how much Sam loves school! I know Lucas will be the same, it just seems such a big thing for us, but I think for them it is just a new adventure! xx
June 17, 2015 at 9:40 amAwww Hayley it’ll be hard but he will just fly! I’m certain he will love it and do really well. He’s only come this far because of you and his Dad doing such a good job.
June 15, 2015 at 12:00 pmStop fretting and be proud xxxxx
Thank you lovely, it’s so hard to step back from it all! I know he will have so much fun there though xx
June 17, 2015 at 9:41 am