I’m always conscious that I don’t do as much with the twins as I did with Lucas when it was just us two at home. It’s a combination of them being two of them, working around the school run and the fact that we don’t usually have a car in the week. Some of my happiest memories from when Lucas was young was just going out for walks with him, he was always so happy outdoors (he’s growing out of that now!) and at this age when their speech is exploding it’s lovely to get them out and chatting about the world around them.
The last few weeks I’ve had my Mum’s car until she comes back for it next month – it’s taken me a while to get used to having one and I almost forgot it’s there. I’ve been unsure of where to go with it, it’s such a novelty for us. Last week I’d had a tough day with the boys, they were obviously getting fed up with being stuck in and I didn’t want another day going the same way. I decided to take them out to one of our favourite parks, it’s about a 20 minute drive from ours so only usually get to go at the weekend. I’d messaged my friend on the way, as I know she walks her baby round there, so we met up for tea and cake.
I think I’ve taken photos at Calderstones Park in almost every season apart from winter, these ones from Autumn always make me smile and it was one of the first times I remember being out with all three of the boys and finding it ever so slightly easier. I thought the twins looked so grown up in them, then this week we were back in exactly the same spot. It’s strange watching them play there when they don’t need me with them as much now. They run around and play together, they climb over the fallen trees and collect little treasures chatting to each other as they go. Most of the time I just sit back and watch them, it’s odd not to be constantly chasing after them. They come to me if they need me but it isn’t often, they spend most of the time running away from me!
When I looked back on the photos from the day they looked so grown up – I think I’ll always see them as my babies even though they are far from it. In my head I don’t see the big changes in them, I can’t remember them looking much different to how they do now. It’s only when I look back at old photos I can suddenly see how much has changed. It’s sad in a way that I don’t follow every milestone and leap like I once did, I know I don’t take as many photos as I used to and I don’t think I share as many of our every day moments. But, they are the moments I will want to look back on; to remember a day when we just went to the park, when they ran through the hedges and climbed on the trees. A day when it was so cold yet they both ate ice cream and splashed in puddles, a day when a spontaneous catch up with a friend is totally what I needed. It was a day when I saw that they’ve grown up so much more than I’ve realised.